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Saturday Game Night Recap - War of the Roses


The big game of the evening was the latest installment of the ongoing War of the Roses campaign being play at the club. Nine players took part in the struggle which is ably described by the campaign's moderator and scribe Douglas Rains.

England

1457 A.D.

Summer

Happy days! The Villa in Town is completed! Say goodbye to those vile tradesmen and merchants. This of course means that your chronicler will be timelier with his reporting, therefore this missive.

The summer meeting between the Houses of Lancaster and York went somewhat differently than those that have happened of late. The House of Lancaster was represented by Lord Brian of until recently Firenze, C-I-C, Sir Douglas, Baronet of Mackie, Sir Jonathan, Baronet of Lizard Rock and Sir Edward of Lexington. Sir Joseph, Baronet of Churchwood and the King were strangely absent from the field. More on this later. The House of York was represented by Sir Jeffery, Baronet of Meadow Park, C-I-C, Sir Andrew, Baronet of Plume, Lord Luis, Baron de la Rochelle, Sir Robert, Baronet of Elmwood and Lord Douglas, Baron of Monteagle.

Lancaster controlled the towns and had choice of field. York controlled the Bishops and chose the matchups.

Outnumbered by York, things looked bleak for the House of Lancaster, but never fear, Sir Jeffery was in charge of the forces of York. Lancaster deployed with Sir Jonathan on the far left, Sir Douglas on the near left, Sir Brian on the near right and Sir Edward on the far right. York deployed with Sir Andrew on the far left, Sir Jeffery on the near left, Lord Luis on the near right and Sir Robert on the far right. Sir Jeffery sent Lord Monteagle on a flank march to turn the right flank but then deployed York across the entire front. With the right flank entry behind the Lancaster line blocked by Sir Edward and no room remaining to join the York line, Lord Monteagle was forced to arrive behind the York right flank 3 hours into the battle. Both sides pressed forward strongly and met in the middle of the field. For the battle account I shall start from the left. Sir Andrew strove mightily against Sir Jonathan, however Sir Jonathan was favored by God and broke Sir Andrew’s force quickly and then slaughtered them where they stood. Almost none of Sir Andrew’s forces escaped. Sir Jeffery attacked Sir Douglas and no doubt inspired by the preceding gallantry of Sir Douglas and Lord Monteagle, personally lead with his retinue and cleverly deployed his forces so that when he fell, his entire force with the exception of one element of Knights fled the field immediately. (It seems the surest way to victory for either House is to have Sir Jeffery in charge of the other side.) On the near right Lord Luis faced Lord Brian and fared poorly with his force brought to the brink of breaking. Lord Monteagle had moved to back up Lord Luis but the Frenchman’s forces would not get out of the way so this help was ineffective and left Lord Monteagle cornered between Lord Brian and Sir Douglas. Lest it be said that Lord Monteagle was not an enthusiastic supporter of the Yorkists, he did dispatch an element of Sir Douglas’ Skirmishers. (A bunch of uppity peasants armed with the new demonic inspired fire sticks.) On the far right Sir Robert pushed Sir Edward back and broke his army which never the less stood its ground. At this point, with casualties more than double those of Lancaster, the forces of the House of York fled the field leaving the captured York Heir Edward, Earl of March in the hand of the Lancastrians.

In the after battle parlay, with several captured York Heirs to chose from, the Lancastrians chose the highest ranking and Edward, Earl of March lost his head. Lord Brian then promoted Sir Jonathan to Baron and (Surprise, surprise!) himself to Viscount. With one victory to the House of Lancaster and one battle called for rain, there will be a final battle in the fall. There are two remaining Lancaster Heirs and three Yorkist Heirs.

There has been much discussion on the results of this battle and we are left with a number of questions. Was it the absence of the King or Sir Joseph that allowed for Lancaster’s win? A valid question as the King is something of an idiot and Sir Joseph is after all just a merchant. Was it the inspired leadership of Lord Brian that allowed the victory or the less inspiring leadership of Sir Jeffery that cause the defeat? Another valid question as we know that Lord Brian covets leadership as a way to promote himself and Sir Jeffery has an abysmal track record as a commander. Sir Andrew has suggested that Sir Joseph was recovering from illness and could not make muster. Your chronicler prefers to think of it as in typical merchant fashion; Sir Joseph was getting blood from a stone!

Special thanks to Sir Joseph for the Yuletide gift of a hill. A big beautiful, nay a perfect hill! Sir Edward is going to love it.

Your Chronicler

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